WORLD CRUISE ADVENTURE

“Never trust a man in uniform....especially sailors!...and remember my dear, men never make passes at girls wearing glasses!...so keep those specs of yours on!”

My darling grandmothers advice to me rang in my ears as I walked up the gangplank to board the Saga Rose for the first time, full of excitement, slight trepidation, and fascination...would we get seasick?...Do I have enough concert dresses?.....Would saga prove to be more Hip Op than Hip Hop?...so many questions, so few answers. And to cap it all, we were going to sail all the way to Brazil,a country I had never expected to visit, let alone sail to in a ship full of the elderly....too exciting for words. Hang on to those zimmer frames, we are off!

Day 2. At Sea.

The bay of biscay....say no more, just writing those words now make me feel like Kermit the frog..its not easy being green, especially when one has to blow a clarinet in a force 8 gale, trying to keep on top of my chops, whilst the boat crashes around madly and I try not to swallow my reed. Poor Susan is in bed, her Kermit complection slightly darker than mine, sick bags flying around the cabin whilst I dodge them bravely. Elle seems perfectly fine..pianists obviously are immune to seasickness...or maybe its the Vodka! Who said cruising was easy?

Day 4. Cabaret Capers.

Calm after the storm...yes! Today is a very exciting day because.....drumroll....we now transform ourselves into Cabaret Artistes for the night. The last few nights I have sat in the huge, plush ballroom upstairs, watching the other cabaret performers strut their stuff with professionalism and panache...and now its our turn, and I feel absolutely terrified. Our rehearsal is a flurry of getting used to microphones, spotlights, and trying to write some funny{!} gags and stories that hopefully wont bomb too much....cant eat anything at supper, even though its lobster on the menu....We decide on what to wear, even though this takes us longer than our rehearsal!..red dresses all the way, the Scarlet Temptresses Hit Saga World!..pacemakers watch out!!!....we wait backstage, nervous and excited.....Yippee, we are on....blur.......yes, they laughed at my jokes.....and Elles...and Susans....and the music was jolly OK too...I dont want to come off stage, having too much fun.....applause washes over us as we run off stage.....Cant wait to do it again!

Day 5.Land Ahoy.

Susan and I fling on our dressing-gowns, and race down the corridor towards deck in a flurry of excitement..we walk onto the small deck at the back of the ship and peer through the darkness towards the glinting lights of Madeira. This is a wonderfully magical moment, our first sight of land for many days. We can just make out the mountains rising out of the sea, as the ship coasts gently towards the dock..... At 8am, we are already racing off the ship, the first ones off, eager to explore and find our land legs once more. Madeira is beautiful, full of flowers, craggy views, and the best fish lunch in the world. We stagger around at first, our legs finding it hard to adjust to being on land again...take a taxi ride up into the mountains, just catching a glimpse of wonderful views through swirling mists....its sad to have to get back on the ship, but the Cape Verdi Islands are beckoning...